Check out the American Girl- Best You Can Be Series

 I am putting a personal promote for the American Girl Best You Can Be series of books which provides well researched information to help you and your daughter navigate through life situations. I utilize this resource because it is written in developmentally appropriate language, the illustrations are engaging and the advise is pertinent to the concerns girls may face. You can find them online, at bookstores (Barnes and Noble have a special display) or for a bargain at Half Price Books!

 A Smart Girl's Guide to Knowing What...

by Patti Kelley Criswell

by Nancy Holyoke

4.6 out of 5 stars (14)

$9.95

A Smart Girl's Guide to Friendship T... by Patti Kelley Criswell

4.6 out of 5 stars (31)

$9.95

The Care and Keeping of You (American Girl) (... by Valorie Schaefer

4.8 out of 5 stars (430)

$9.95

Finding our Voice

We have been working the past few weeks on determining some healthy strategies to share feelings. It was important for us to become aware of coping skills that can be unhealthy (feel good at the moment, but regret them later) versus healthy (which can be helpful and allow us to communicate) strategies. Here are our top three healthy strategies:

1. Take some time to slow down, take a breath and think before you respond. Many girls talked about spending some time alone, thinking or rehearsing the response to share with the other person and making sure to speak only to the person who is upsetting us.
2. Use a journal to write or draw what is upsetting you. Allowing yourself to use the journal as a release, whether it be to draw, use it to inspire you with favorite quotes or share frustrations of the day. A journal can also be a good communication tool between you and a family member to share feelings in a way which may feel more comfortable than face-to-face.
3. Talk to a trusted adult about the situation. Many girls shared the person would be a Mom, Aunt or teacher they would share feelings with. We encouraged the girls to let the adults know if they just need someone to listen, instead of trying to solve the problem. Helping your child brainstorm and discuss the pro's and con's of decision will empower them and strengthen their ability to solve relational conflicts.

We felt the girls have a good understanding of the strategies, our encouragement is not only talk about them, but put the strategies into action in their daily lives.

How is your TONE?? Using our voice in a way others want to hear it

During session three, we examined our tone of voice and how it can impact the way others view us. Similar to the previous session on body language, the way we say it can directly impact our relationships. For example, if a statement was made, "I really like your shirt!" can sound much different than, "I really like your shirt?" By changing the tone, the words are received much differently. We contrasted speaking with an authentic tone versus speaking with a sarcastic tone. The girls then practiced the different tones and watched the body language of the person responding. If they did offend in their tone, the follow up step was to practice an appropriate response of an apology.

As a parent, you may of given this discussion on tone before...I know I have. It is a difficult habit to correct in your child without feeling frustrated. Sometimes the best opportunities are when your child is feeling like someone gave them "tone". Ask them to share how it felt, how they wished that other person would have responded to them. Then ask a reflective question like, "I wonder if you have ever made someone feel that way?" Brainstorm ways to remind and correct the bad habit of negative tone and sarcasm. Please share any great ideas you may have!

Using our VOICE and setting boundaries

In session two,  we focused on watching the subtle cues of body language. Did you know many times when someone drops eye contact with you or gently moves away they are sending a signal? The Girls Being Girls group disected just exactly what that may mean and how to respond to it. The girls and teachers shared different experiences when first impressions where made in just how someone gave them eye contact or personal space. We talked about being responsive to the signals others give us and reacting appropriately to them. A great way to check in with your daughter and practice this is to possibly role play different emotions through charades or when watching a movie ask your daughter to share what their body language is saying. Although it may seem like a simple task, it is a very grey area sometimes, especially as we try to view the actions of our peers. So many messages- it is definitely great discussion and builds your daughter's social intelligence!

Our first meeting!

We had a great start to the Girls Being Girls group. The girls were excited to share all the wonderful qualities of being a girl! The words sounded like: strong, funny, smart and caring. When we asked them to think of words to describe adult women, we heard words like:patient, helpful, loving and the boss of the house!

The girls created "Positive Reflections" locker mirrors focusing them on the skill of using affirmations. We explained that affirmations are positive words or encouraging staments that have a personal meaning or motivation for us. We shared that even adults use affirmations as a strategy to build their self-esteem.

The locker mirrors were amazing! We hope to post some pictures of them soon and appreciate all of the wonderful donations to help this group process.

Dove Self Esteem Beauty Campaign

  I spent some time on the Dove website and was excited by all the ideas and materials they have for Moms and their daughters from ages 8-18. There are suggestions for 1:1 activities, dealing with cyber drama and the amazing impact Moms have on their daughters' view of self. I encourage everyone to check it out- here is the link:

http://www.dove.us/Social-Mission/Self-Esteem-Toolkit-And-Resources/1-On-1-Activities-for-Girls8-12.aspx

First Meeting of Girls Being Girls

The first meeting Of Girls Being Girls will take place on Tuesday, Oct. 25 during lunch and recess. It will take place in Mrs. Gasson and Mrs.Castner's classroom.